QWhat is abstinence?
The word abstinence refers to voluntary prevention of oneself from indulging in bodily activities that provide pleasure. Abstinence commonly refers to restraining from sexual intercourse, alcohol or food for example sexual abstinence is the practice of refraining from all aspect of sexual activity by self-volition.
QI’m not ready to give in to sex, but my boyfriend tells me that sexual intercourse would make the affection we have for each other grow stronger. Is this true?
Having sexual intercourse alone does not make a good relationship. You can love someone without going to bed with him. You don’t prove your love with sex. Sexual intercourse can be wonderful in a loving relationship. But if one person doesn’t want it, it is not an act of love to force that person to have it. If you do not want to have sexual relationship with your boyfriend, don’t. He must respect your decision. If he can’t, then he doesn’t love you like he claims. Speak to your boyfriend again about your feelings. If he would not listen, you may need to reconsider your staying in that relationship.
QHow do you know if it’s really love that you feel for a person?
This is a difficult question because there aren’t clear cut definitions of what love is. Many young people often “fall in love” once they begin dating. However it is important to recognize the differences between infatuation and true love. Infatuation is an intense, exciting kind of feeling. People sometimes mistake infatuation for love, but infatuation usually doesn’t last very long, while true love does.
QAre there benefits in waiting to have sex in a relationship?
In reality, there are many freedoms you can enjoy from waiting to have sex until marriage, including:
- Freedom from pregnancy and all it entails
- Freedom from pressure to marry prematurely
- Freedom from sexually transmitted diseases
- Freedom from the side effects of contraceptives
- Freedom from the guilt, doubt, disappointment, worry, and intensified feelings of rejection that are associated with unmarried sexual activity
- Freedom to focus your energy on establishing and accomplishing your goals
- Freedom to enjoy being a teenager
- Freedom to develop a better understanding of friends and to enjoy dating relationships
QIs it all right to kiss on your first date? Is it wrong to get into necking and petting? Where should you draw the line?
Opinion on this issue varies, so you alone will decide what you will do. Some people think it’s OK to kiss on a first date, while others don’t. Some think necking is OK; others say you might get carried away and go all the way. Yet still, other think it’s sinful and morally wrong. Your decision on this issue will influenced by your parents’ values, your friends’ opinion, religious beliefs, moral beliefs, and your emotions.
QWhat counts as a relationship?
There are lots of different types of relationship, from casual sex to marriage. People from some backgrounds often get married to someone they’ve only met a few times, and then begin the process of getting to know them and loving them through time. In other contexts, people try relationships out with different people, and it can take a while for them to find out what they want and what works.
All relationships are different, but they usually all have one thing in common – when you’re in a relationship with someone it usually means that you both like each other (and fancy each other!) more than anyone else.
It’s also completely fine not to be in a relationship until you are ready.